It's been a while since I last posted anything. My excuses are laziness and having no internet access (still!) even at my new apartment. However, I'm working on changing that within the next couple of months or so. Meanwhile, I will just have to rely on free WiFi elsewhere.
Recently, I moved to Hershey, PA to pursue graduate studies toward a Ph.D in biomedical science at the Penn State College of Medicine. Let me just say that I'm in for a huge RIDE of all sorts of trials that are going to really test my intellectual, mental, and emotional stamina. I have been attending orientation classes and lectures since Monday and those have been pretty informative (though not fun). I still have another week of orientation before I start my lab rotations and I'm feeling pretty nervous. By the way, I like to be as honest as possible about anything that I post on my blog about where I'm at in my life and what I'm feeling. Who knows? Maybe someone will feel better about themselves after reading this by taking in the satisfaction that they're not as emotional or crazy as I am. But, getting back to my point...
Right now, I have two worst fears. Worst fear number one is me giving up on myself and dropping out of the Ph.D program believing that I'm not [insert word of choice here] enough or worthy to be where I'm at right now. The truth is if I wasn't supposed to be at this stage of my life, the door would have never opened. Worst fear number two is for me to never grow into my potential as a human being and that I will always stay at one stage spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and intellectually. I know that seems kind of strange, because ultimately most people grow if they indeed allow themselves to experience life and learn. However, sometimes I do feel stuck on one level of my development either that or I'm just growing at an extremely slow rate towards becoming the individual that I am supposed to be. One thing that I do struggle with personally is confidence, but with God's help, I believe that this weak area of mine will become stronger in time.
So, for right now in my journey, I want to work on acknowledging my strengths as a person/student, but also work on improving my weaknesses. I know that I can't be strong in everything, but I can improve where I am weak.
For a side note, the rumors are true....
Hershey really does smell like chocolate (the west side of it), actually more like brownies.
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